


it's shaking up my heart

by peachjuho



Category: SF9 (Band)
Genre: Awkward First Times, Cuddling & Snuggling, Defining the Relationship, M/M, Mentioned Kim Seokwoo | Rowoon, Pre-Relationship, but no actual First Time lol
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-28
Updated: 2020-10-28
Packaged: 2021-03-09 00:20:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,323
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27245659
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/peachjuho/pseuds/peachjuho
Summary: hwiyoung has gone and lost his virginity to taeyang, his brother's best friend. now what?
Relationships: Kim Youngkyun | Hwiyoung/Yoo Taeyang
Comments: 18
Kudos: 48





	it's shaking up my heart

**Author's Note:**

> title from [i like you by day6](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=daoMYJv8i0c)

What are you supposed to say to the person you just lost your virginity to?

_ ‘That was nice, thanks.’ _

_ ‘How did I do? Please rate out of ten.’ _

Sure, that would go over well. Great, in fact, surely.

_ ‘Get out of my swamp.’ _

Maybe not a Shrek reference, even though it had been what they were watching… before the… thing they just did.

_ ‘What are we?’ _

Well, that would be stupid, because they weren’t supposed to be anything. Or at least, that’s what they’d agreed when Hwiyoung had asked if Taeyang could take his virginity.

Nothing weird, except it’s not usually a conversation you have the first time you meet someone. Though the circumstances of their meeting could explain it, a little. That is, a slightly tipsy Hwiyoung lamenting over his ex shattering his heart into pieces and Taeyang, the unfortunate acquaintance (that is to say, one of Rowoon’s friends) caught next to him.

Hwiyoung can’t quite recall how the conversation went - he’s pretty sure he said something about wanting to experience something new, in a very suggestive way, but Taeyang had pushed off his advances, saying it was better to be sober, and taken him back to Rowoon.

The text he’d received in the morning was a little sweet.

_ I’m not sure if you have my number but it’s taeyang! i got your number from your brother. if your offer’s still up, I’ll take it! If not, that’s ok. we can still catch up for coffee maybe? _

He’d been mortified, remembering most everything of the night before, but they’d still gone out to eat together. And then they’d become friends. And then sort of friends-with-benefits. Less so the not-safe-for-work type of benefits but just… cuddling, hand-holding. But not dating. No, their relationship was nowhere close to dating.

Until they’d ended up here.

He’s been snuggled in Taeyang’s arms for a while (warm bliss, honestly) but it was getting to the time where they’d probably been lying there for much too long.

Hwiyoung slowly tugs his shirt back over his head. With Taeyang’s burning gaze on him though, he feels all too aware of his semi-nakedness and quickly pulls it over his bare stomach.

The elder is lounging on the bed.

He still doesn’t know what to say.

Taeyang breaks the silence first though, thankfully.

“Do you want something to eat?”

This was a question he was comfortable answering.

He’d been over to Taeyang’s apartment before, and they’d had food together.

“Sure.”

Taeyang himself got up, stretching up, and showing off his body. He twisted slightly, revealing all the red marks up his back. Hwiyoung thought of just minutes ago, how his fingers were…

He shook those thoughts out of his head. Was it appropriate to think of Taeyang like that? It still felt a little wrong, somehow. Especially since Taeyang was still Rowoon’s friend first.

Wasn’t there a rule on dating your brother’s best friend?

Like, don’t do it? Ever?

But they weren’t dating. But sleeping together kind of counted. What would Rowoon think? Did Taeyang say anything to Rowoon? Or was he just keeping it a secret? Was he supposed to say something first about? Was Taeyang as anxious as he was?

He glances at him from the corner of his eye. Taeyang didn’t  _ seem  _ anxious, strolling towards the kitchen with a content smile on his face. Was it just him overthinking this?

Hwiyoung wishes he could read minds.

Catching up to Taeyang, he asks, “What are we eating?”

Taeyang slows down, patting him on the cheek. With a wink, he says, “You.” And then continues onto the kitchen.

Like it’s no big deal that he set off a butterfly storm in Hwiyoung’s stomach.

“Oh.”

“What do you feel like having? I think I have ramyun if you want something quick, but I can also make something a little fancier if you want.”

Hwiyoung nods. “Ramyun sounds fine. I’m not very hungry.”

There’s only the crinkle of the wrappers tearing and the sound of the rolling boil in the pot on the stove for a while. An egg goes in too, and some vegetables. Yum.

Taeyang dishes out the servings on the counter and gestures to Hwiyoung to sit on one of the chairs. It feels very reminiscent of the night that kickstarted… their relationship. Friendship? Whatever they were.

“Was it okay for you?”

His eyes widen, and he nearly chokes on a noodle.

Hwiyoung searches Taeyang’s face, finding only concern and a little amusement (must be from the noodle thing).

“Of course,” he splutters out. “You’ve just… had a lot of experience so I was worried I wasn’t good.”

Taeyang tilts his head, smiling fondly. Can he stop looking so… nice?

“You were great. Perfect, even.”

That doesn’t really seem right, but he can’t just say  _ that’s bullshit _ .

“Thanks, I guess.”

“You don’t have to worry about it anyway, it was your first time and what matters most is that you enjoyed it-”

“I did!” Hwiyoung nods too enthusiastically. “I… thank you. I appreciate it. You didn’t have to.”

“What do you mean?” Taeyang dips his head to slurp up his noodles, keeping his eyes on Hwiyoung. It surfaces another memory he’s decided he’ll probably be locking away in a box for an eternity if he’s ever to face Taeyang again like a normal human being.

“I-I mean,” he stutters, “It’s not like we’re really anything? You didn’t have to just… do that for me.”

“We… aren’t?”

“Yeah? We’re… not?”

They stare at each other.

Taeyang’s stopped chewing. He’s staring intently at Hwiyoung again, like when they knew they weren’t really going to be paying attention to the Shrek movie.

Did he say something wrong?

He breaks his gaze away and shoves a spoonful of soup in his mouth.

Taeyang visibly swallows.

He does too.

“Hwi,” the other starts.

He looks pointedly down into his swirling bowl and braces himself for the rejection.

“I genuinely like you. I care for you a lot. I thought you knew that me asking you out to coffee was, you know, me asking you  _ out _ .” Taeyang’s expression changes, then. His lips pull downwards, his eyebrows furrowed. “I’m sorry. Does that mean you just wanted to fuck me? Do you not actually want to date?”

Hwiyoung peeks back up at Taeyang.

Just in case it was a joke or something. Waiting for him to say  _ ‘Sike! You just got pranked! That’s what you get for crushing on your brother’s best friend, dumbass!’. _

But that didn’t seem like it was happening any time soon.

“Really? You like me?”

It comes out as a bare whisper, tentative and shy.

Some voice in the back of Hwiyoung’s mind thinks about how many times Taeyang’s expression has changed in the last two minutes because now he was looking at Hwiyoung with glistening eyes. 

Taeyang grabs his hands, placing a kiss on his knuckles.

_ Really? _

Hwiyoung stares down at them.

“Really.”

“So you weren’t just psyching me up to sleep with you?”

“Of course not!” Taeyang pouts, and taps his fingers lightly on Hwiyoung’s knuckles. “Let’s go to the couch when you’re done.”

Eating doesn’t take much longer, and Taeyang immediately pulls him by the wrist to the living room. What can he do but follow helplessly?

He falls onto the couch, back into Taeyang’s arms, his new favourite place (no brainer, honestly).

Taeyang runs his hand through his hair and kisses the top of his head. It’s a nice sensation, very peaceful.

“I like you a lot.”

He twists to look at Taeyang’s pretty face. So this was for real.

“I like you too.”

His cheek gets poked.

“Just checking that means you to date? For real this time?”

Hwiyoung flushes pink. “Yes, I do.”

“My baby.” Taeyang pats his cheeks again, and it still sets off the same butterfly storm in his stomach. “I still need to get you home soon though, or Rowoon just might end me.”

**Author's Note:**

> hello... i am hungry for comments... dear reader... please spare one for a poor writer...
> 
> i think writing, especially with fanfic, is something where it's important to have a community, to which not only writers, but also readers, are an integral part of. it's disheartening to see the only feedback i generally get are from my fellow writers but you know, what can you do?
> 
> on a less serious note! thank you very much for reading, i genuinely appreciate all kudos and comments so very much ♡


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